ONLY IN AMERICA WALMART

Those shoes are not blue nor are they suede.

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How am I supposed to slap a ho without an essential part of my balanced breakfast?

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Nothing says sanitary like a parrot in the produce section…

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“What are you wearing sexy?” -Cowboy boots. “Ya, that’s hot.” – Pink velour pants.

“Ya I like that.” – a little green baby girl hoodie. “Oh damn, that sounds sexy.”

– and I kinda look like Gallagher. “Oh ya…wait…what?”

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Do you see the flame shoes buddy? That means I will not think twice about karate chopping you

Into the middle of next week!

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I think I just sharted…

WTF???

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Is that Rainbow Brite all grown up??

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Is that a soccer ball?  A map of the solar system?  The structure of a sub-atomic particle?

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I have absolutely no idea what to say…

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Is that a gangster leotard?

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Everyone loves the man in the yellow go-go boots!

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Nice purse!

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AHH! I love the frozen food section… it tingles!

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Umm… excuse me, sir…

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At least the purse matches, right?

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Rawr…

No, honey, it’s an ancient Egyptian symbol of prosperity, I swear!

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I was wondering why you suddenly smelled better.

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Every man has an NFL jersey AND pink short-shorts in their wardrobe, right?

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I have the same outfit, only in red.

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Just in case you had the urge…

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Now all we need is Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem for a reunion tour.

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Yes, you are seeing that correctly.  Old man + large, supple breast implants.